Fake Out: Priyanka Chopra’ s Nose Is As Real As Snooki’s Tan
Oh you know it’s true! The future NFL Network star says:
“So far, I have never felt the need for any enhancement surgery. What I have is what I have been blessed with. People had a lot of issues about the fact that I was dusky and not a conventional-looking heroine.
It hurts when people judge or crucify me on imaginary counts. I have looked different at different ages because I have worked on my look.”
AND she eats whatever she wants and NEVER works out and her nose changes shape all by itself…is there anything this woman can’t do?
“The bad hurts me and me alone, and the good comes because of my amazing personality.”
AND she has an amazing personality!!
Sigh, PC you so perfect, I swear by Snooki’s tan and all things unholy and natural that you are my idol forever and ever.
Nargis Fakhri’s World Domination Plans
…and while PC is busy taking over the NFL, Nargis just can’t decide what the hell she’s going to do given that no one in Bollywood wants to touch her with a barge pole. I mean, for acting assignments.
So we’ve heard that she wants to open a bed & breakfast complete with organic farm recently, but since that Marie Claire interview (which was what, a couple weeks ago?) the plan has changed to social service, you know like….:
“I want to help people, be of some service, you know. Maybe become like Oprah (Winfrey) some day.”
Why don’t you just try the medical profession next while you’re at it Nargis?
Here is what you were meant to do: IT IS CALLED M-O-D-E-L-I-N-G. And there is no shame in it.
Cast Outs: Arjun & Shahid
So Arjun Rampal is no longer playing the role of Sher Khan (originally essayed by the inimitable Pran) for the Zanjeer remake which would be totally uninteresting news if it weren’t such a huge relief. I mean could he BE any less Sher Khan-ish? Buzz is that Sanjay Dutt is replacing him – a more suitable fit IMO. As per the B-town norm, the news is pretty confirmed except that no one has confirmed it yet.
Shahid Kapoor is also out of Maneesh Sharma’s (of Band Baaja Baarat fame) next which was so potentially scandalous that YRF apparently sent out a press release to confirm it (which immediately made it all business-like and boring).
And yet, the TOI gets the last word in their report:
What is a bummer though is the fact that Shahid would have been the leading man of Vishal Bhardwaj’s Matru Ki Bijlee Ka Mandola had he not committed to Maneesh Sharma at that point.
Kicked Out: Ameesha Patel, Item Girl
Just one more milestone in Ameesha’s epic Bollywood career graph – being turned down for an item number by her director Susi Ganesan, of Shortcut Romeo:
“She was insistent about doing the number ever since she heard that there is one in the film. But her part in the movie is a negative one. I couldn’t change the part and make her do an item song. As a director, I told her that it would affect the whole character graph; so I had to refuse.” [Source]
As though doing this movie with Neil Nitin Mukesh isn’t bad enough, now she wants to take it to a whole new level of Sad by offering herself up as an item girl even though it doesn’t make any sense for the character. Le WHY? Just do your goddamn negative role and show us that you can maybe possibly act. Lord knows we’ve seen enough of your skin-show every opportunity you get.
Someone, seriously please answer me this, is she trying to stay on the D-list?
Lash Out: Farah Khan For No Discernible Reason
After clearly urging Shahrukh to greet her Karela & Kaddu at Mannat so that the film would garner greater visibility and favor among his fan base (otherwise known as “promoting” but not according to Farah), to which he graciously acquiesced with his trademark wit and even talked about why out-of-the-box films like Joker should be given a chance -
- Farah went all Hulk Hogan on the media when they dared to state that Shahrukh had promoted the film:
I think she’s just lost her marbles because of too much pressure regarding the whole Shirish-SRK fight/apology plus everybody-hates-Joker situation. There was a comment on my Shirish Kunder post about how we shouldn’t talk about their marriage and normally I would agree with that 100%.
But what makes it difficult in Farah’s case is that so much of her career IS tied up with her personal relationships. After all, SRK isn’t the one who asked to take pictures – nor did any of the other stars she approached. She took that route because they are her friends and she thought it would be fun.
So now when she’s turning around and being so hypocritical about the whole thing (apparently Shirish’s Ra.One apology touched a nerve), it’s hard not to make things personal. I’ll say this much, Farah is way too sensitive about Shirish, and it has caused her to act irrationally and emotionally towards her other relationships on several occasions now.
See, this is the problem I have with these next-gen so-philosopical-post-modern-bullshit-stream-of-consciousness type directors.
“It won’t be like a romantic film. It won’t be out-an-out romantic-comedy film. All the three ideas have one thing – drama, they deal with drama. They talk about day-to-day human things. All I can say is I am working towards the ideas that I have in my mind.”
Exhibit B: Sahil Sangha of Love Breakups Zindagi fame talking about his alleged next:
“I am writing a coming of age story. It is about a guy who gets into a problem and how he overcomes it.”
“It is not a romantic problem like girl is not there in his life and those types. There is a love story… There is an element of emotion.”
Great. Sounds like they know what they’re talking about then. Here, how about this: WHY DON’T YOU TRY A P-L-O-T?
It’s Heeeeeeere!! DISCO DEEWANE!
YOU GUYS!!! I am totally and unabashedly embracing the cheese with this one. Like seriously, this one song has taken me from SOTY-hater to SOTY-lover in two minutes flat.
But tell me this, because I can’t figure it out. Do you think this is self-referential cheese or unintentional cheese?
Whatever it is, I AM DOWN WITH THE CHEESE! THE ORIGINAL KJO IS BACK WITH A BANG!