16 Comments

The Joker Fallout: Shirish Kunder’s Journey From SRK To Akshay Kumar

Courtesy Glamsham

CNN-IBN reports that Akshay, Shirish and Farah are friends no longer and that Akshay has vowed never to work with them again. Apparently he’s upset because the film isn’t in 3D like he was promised, and because Farah promoted the film with SRK.

I think he’s just upset that he signed the film in the first place.

It remains to be seen whether Akshay starts promoting on the 27th, if he jumps ship entirely or if he denies the article, but judging by Farah and Shirish’s reactions today on twitter one can assume that there is at least some kernel of truth to the whole story.

For now, let us amuse ourselves with:

How NOT To Make A Movie

1. Don’t diss one of the biggest stars in the country on the eve of his dream-movie’s release on a public platform. Karma is a….

2. Don’t get slapped by him at a party and then go cry to your wife.

3. Don’t be a weasel.

4. Don’t make a stupid film.

5. Don’t piss off the formerly un-piss-offable Akshay Kumar by promising him something that you are not able to deliver.

“Akshay Kumar is someone who would never leave a film incomplete. His past record proves that he has never left a film mid-way. He was creatively dissatisfied with the film as he felt cheated that whatever was promised to him was never delivered. In spite of all this, he completed the film and then decided to distance himself.”

6. Don’t then make snide tweets about the lead hero of said film (once again on a public platform) even before the film releases, a hero whose fan base is always, always, ALWAYS going to be bigger than yours.

7. Don’t make a song called “I Want Fakht You”, pretend that it was leaked, feign surprise at why on earth anyone would be offended by those lyrics and then deny that the whole thing was a publicity stunt.

8. Don’t make your wife and your bewildered female lead do all the promotional interviews.

9. Don’t make aliens out of vegetables. Don’t send them to people’s houses. A good marketing campaign = doing at least one live TV interview, not hiding in the vegetable garden.

10. Don’t block Get Filmy. Or all the other people who might’ve been willing to give you a chance if you didn’t constantly prove yourself  to be an insecure douche.

11. Don’t apologize for the Ra.One tweet a few days before your own film’s release and on the same day that the Akshay article surfaces. It looks bad (see #3 above). Also it looks like maybe you’re trying to find favor with SRK because of the Akshay fallout in the same way you ran to Akshay and Salman after the SRK fallout.

12. Don’t stress out your wife who has always had impeccable relations with the whole industry. Until she married you.

13. Don’t act shady and shifty about your film. You made a film, stand behind it (somewhere other than twitter), be proud of it no matter what the world says. Don’t start looking for who you can blame because…it just makes you look like a (you guessed it) weasel.

14. Nice. Did someone tell you to write that after you tweeted that thing about leaders running away?

15. Don’t be a weasel. Just. Don’t.

BONUS: Your next film is with Salman Khan so you better make very very very very very very sure that you’ve got your shit together. Because if you piss him off, it’s really game over.

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16 comments on “The Joker Fallout: Shirish Kunder’s Journey From SRK To Akshay Kumar

  1. Gosh HOWLARIOUS! I’ve no clue what a woman like Farah is doing with a err…weasel like Kunder!

  2. Bahaaahahhahha , cant stop laughing…can u coin a word 4 this to :P
    I loooved #2 , just loved it

  3. OMG this one is epic !!! why on earth did Farah marry this douche ?

    • What is Farah herself ? A Witch with Capital ‘B’ … Ram Milaye Jodi !! Farah with her Psyco Bro Sajid are PITA for the entire film industry. Their only achievement are being born in a film industry and licking SRK’s A** . She dimoloshed Saroj Khan’s career because she starting to believe that she is a great choreographer.

  4. But…but…”don’t be a weasel” is so HAAAARD. How will I be able to show the world my special special vision if all my energy is taken up being a weasel?

    I actually have no particular issue with Jaan-e-Mann as a film, but this guy’s public persona is a nightmare. He’s my go-to example for the difficulties in separating persona from work and the negative effects that can have.

    Mmmm, vegetables.

  5. Trying hard not to agree because I like Farah but this is one funny post. Especially like the BONUS part: “Your next film is with Salman Khan so you better make very very very very very very sure that you’ve got your shit together. Because if you piss him off, it’s really game over.”

  6. Step aside faaaltu management funda leaders…awesome post here!! Man! Kya khilaya shirish ne….kya kismet hai saaley ki.

  7. LOVE it!!!! hahahaha!

  8. Super post, was laughing out loud throughout! :D
    Just one correction:
    #2 : Don’t get slapped by him at a party and then go cry to your husband. ;)

  9. I have this really tragic narrative in my head where Farah just felt like she was getting old and Shirish, seeing a primo meal-ticket, paid her all this dude-y attention, and she just fell for it, thinking that he was her last chance. I really hope that’s not true, and that he is really nice to her and madly in love with her. Farah is a smart, funny, attractive woman; it’s sad to see her hubby taking her down. I remember her mentioning how her husband doesn’t like seeing her all dressed up and romancing other men onscreen. Really? Dude works in films and can get over it.

  10. It’s really not our job or place to comment on someone else’s marriage. I apologise for having done that.

    Jaaneman, I had no issues with either, I actu found it corny in the Sajd Khan-TV shows space. But hell, Kunder comes across as one, how do you say that – ‘douche bag’ :/ God be with him.

  11. What a fab post!

    Shrish is really a jerk! He just has f****ed up this entire situation. You hav described it properly. And Akshay’s silence gives out vibes that something is fishy. If Shirish continues to act like this, one day he might be slapped by Akki too! Then we’ll have Akshay-Shirish slapgate. ;-)

  12. I saw this coming. Shirish Kunder completely is ungrateful for his position and is completely insecure that’s why he doesn’t want to promote JOKER. He is not confident on his own product which he produces and directs for over 3 years. I liked Jaaneman for the songs and the art direction but JOKER is no where close to it.

  13. buwahahaha! I lol-ed on this post, literally!
    Another awesome post!

    The association with Shirish has cost Farah so much professionally. Why she chose him is beyond me.

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